Tuesday, April 8, 2008

The Worth of a Mommy

Full time stay at home moms are not given the credit they deserve.

I can't think of a job that encompasses more job titles:

Childcare provider- aka "Diaper Changer Extraordinaire"

Maid- Pigsty lectures only get you so far.

Chef- "I don't like this. I want peanut butter and jelly."

Chauffer- Forget the limo...bring on the minivan with DVD!

Nurse- Able to list off each kid's individual dosage of Tylenol without pause according to weight and age.

Crime scene investigator- Evidence weighs heavy when trying to figure out who wrote on the wall with marker.

Judge- "How do you plead on the accusation of marking on the wall with a Sharpie?"

Jury- "I find you guilty on all counts of marking up the wall with black permanent ink."

Executioner- "As punishment you will sit in the corner for five minutes and when you come out you must help mommy clean the wall."

Jailer- "If you get out of time out I will add minutes to your time."

Financial consultant- "That's too expensive, put it back."

Butler- Ever answering calls for water at 2am.

Bank- "Here are four tokens, go play Skeeball."

Laundromat- It literally never ever stops.

Policewoman- "You are in violation of rule 182 that states you may not get up from the table until you ask to be excused."

Referee- "I saw what you did to your sister. Time out for you buddy!" (Refer to executioner and jailer descriptions.)

Fashionista- "Those do not match, go back to your room and put on the outfit I laid out for you."

Educator- "Yes, daddy's expensive watch will flush down the toilet."

Plumber- Usually fishing for toys or stopping toilet overflow (see above).

Milk Maid- Nothing like a screaming infant pulling on your shirt at the store.

Chief Negotiator- "If you are good on this shopping trip I will let you pick out a treat."

Historian- Baby book keeper, photographer, sentimental keepsakes saver.

Nutritionist- "Pretend your broccoli is a tree and eat it like a dinosaur."

Speech Therapist- "Say dada. Daaaahhh dahhhh. Daaaaahhh dahhhhh."

Secretary- Arranges playdates, doctor's appointments, and Gymboree.

Courier- "I've gotta run two dozen cookies to Jr's class today."

Cheerleader- Sits at every sporting event and roots for her favorite player.

Defense attorney- Because that bully at school is going to pay!

Nurturer- This is the most important job of all. One that defines our career and makes us unique in our jobs.

Today my eleven month old son was sick. Last night he was up five times. He was pretty pitiful. I had to wake him up from a nap to pick up Bear and he laid over my shoulder and patted my back affectionately. To him, I am everything. There is nobody above me. No concept of God...nothing greater than mommy. I am the healer of all things yucky. By the end of the day I was covered in snotty smears and as tired as I was I longed to pick him up for one last warm baby hug complete with back patting action. I turned up the baby monitor so I could hear every noisy breath, every cough. No matter that I might wake up more often, I just wanted to hear every movement he makes. He is everything to me, but to him I am all he knows and the only person he trusts to keep him safe. For that I am honored.

There is no way to pay a mom. No monetary value you can place on what she does day in and day out. Truly moms shape our world and can influence a whole generation...what other job gives us that kind of responsibility?

The last four months that I have been unemployed have been busy. I love my new job staying at home, but there is truly nothing quite as diificult or exhausting and I wouldn't trade my position for anything else in the world.

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